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  1. NYGT Is Coming Soon!

    Sunday, February 17, 2019















    Hello everyone.  I want to believe the winter is almost over.  Let me have 
    my fantasy.






    If you want to come to a show where I will be performing and like to plan 
    ahead, here’s what’s going on:


    Wednesday, March 6, 7pm NEW YORK’S GOT TALENT
    This is a show that lets you, the audience, decide who goes through each week, along with 3 New York Industry Judges (Broadway & Off-Broadway Producers, Agents, & Directors).
    Cast your vote at
    The Green Room 42 to crown the winner of New York's Got Talent Season 6!
    This is one where I really need supporters to attend.





    Sunday, March 10, 4pm
    MisFit Hive
    38-02 61st Street
    Queens, NY
    More details to come.



    Sunday, March 31st, 8:30pm
    Jazz on the Park Hostel
    36 West 106th Street
    NYC
    You are welcome to BYOB.
    FREE Show!



    Now, for some other stuff.  As many of you know, I’m in a long penis-free 
    era.  The door in my mind isn’t nailed shut.  It’s just that I’ve gained some decent standards over the years, and that eliminates so many.  Like I say in my stand-up, I’m not looking, but I am noticing.


    Here’s a recent happening.  I got a Facebook friend request that I 
    expected to delete, but when I looked at his page, unless it is all fiction, he seemed to have 2 daughters and a dog.  It said he is single.  Maybe he’s divorced.  I don’t know.  He claimed to be an orthopedic surgeon living in Queens.  I told myself not to immediately dismiss this one.  Additionally, his picture looks like he’s in my age range (so I had the expectation of maturity), and he’s kind of good looking.  I figured I’d accept his friend request, and if it turns out not to be right, I’ll unfriend.


    I accepted.  He private messaged, “Hi gorgeous.”


    I felt turned off.  I expected better from an older, educated person.  It’s different if he knew me.  I thought he would have checked out my page and interests and accomplishments before jumping in and commenting on the superficial. 


    I didn’t reply.  The next day he wrote again.  He asked how I was doing 
    today.  Maybe he had spent a second or two on self-reflection.  I answered truthfully.  I said I was okay, off to help a friend clean, was going to get paid, and I needed the cash.  Would talk another time.


    He responded with, “Okay, honey.”


    I responded, “Mindy.  Save the endearing terms for those you actually 
    know.”  Then I left my house and worked at a friend’s house for a couple of hours. 


    When I got home, he had responded, “Okay.  But it doesn’t matter.”


    I was puzzled and further turned off.  Yet I responded (I guess I’m still a 
    work in progress).  I first sent “?”  Then I added, “The way someone talks to me matters to me.”


    He wrote back, “Okay I understand.”


    That’s a surgeon, according to his page.  Oh God, hopefully he understands 
    bones better than he understands himself and women. 


    Now, people, do you see why my penis-free era is preferable?!  








  2. My Bloody Valentine By Rhonda Hansome

    Thursday, February 14, 2019



    ♫ I wish you bluebirds in the spring to give your heart a song to sing and then a kiss, but more than this I wish you love🎜

    Today I learned that Valentine's Day may have an origin even bloodier than the eponymous Chicago massacre.

    If the internet is to be believed, Lupercalia was an ancient Roman mid - Februrary festival honoring the she-wolf who nurtured the abandonded twins, Romulus & Remus.         The ritual began with Luperci (a sect of Roman priests) sacrificing goats (representing sexuality) AND a dog. The sacrificial blood was then smeared on the foreheads of naked Luperci. After the blood was removed with milk soaked wool, feasting ensued.

    And Then...

    Weilding strips of the sacrificial goat hide, naked Luperci ran through the public square whipping women; who exposed their skin to receive their fertility anointing.

     But Wait There's More!

    Men randomly chose from a jar the name of a woman to be coupled with for the duration of the festival. Some actually fell in love and married.

    🎜I wish you shelter from the storm
    A cozy fire to keep you warm
    Most of all when snowflakes fall
    I wish you love 🎝

    Valentine's Day is a commercial holiday with romantic pretensions and a sanguine provenance, without even mentioning those named Valentine, executed by Roman Emperor Claudius II.

    🎜Love is strange🎝

    If you are reading this please leave a comment.
    I wish you the best Valentine's Day, remembering even if you're alone, you can always...
    🎜Love the one you're with🎝

    Rhonda Hansome is a comic, actor, director, story teller and coach. She frequently appears on webseries, podcasts and radio shows. Hear her every Monday, noon - 2, on John Fugelsang's SiriusXM Insight show Tell Me Everything. 7 AM Fri. Feb. 15th, catch Rhonda on WBAI FM 99.5 on Waking Up With Julianna Forlano.






  3. Accomplishments:     


     I carefully burned some mustache hairs.  They aren’t gone, but they are short and less tempting to play with while making a first impression.

    ·        I survived a show where comics outnumbered audience members.

    ·       After having a screw-up with unemployment, things are now straightened out and I am no longer under threat of no gas, electric, cell phone, internet, cable, and home phone.

    ·        Did long overdue laundry.

    ·        Am with medical coverage again.

    ·        Eating more salad and hummus than usual.

    ·        Submitted a poem for publication (which I haven’t done in too long).





    Still needs work:
    ·       


    My weight has not gone down.  I don’t like being overweight.  It’s hard enough to stand tall and breathe.  Plus I’m not of the stature to carry so much weight.  A belly dance teacher, Zoe, once looked me over and said, “You’re not supposed to be fat.”  She didn’t say that to some bigger than me.  She looked at my bone structure.  She was right. 

           The apartment.  The paper clutter.  It doesn’t end.


    Cigarette smoking problem.

        Should be writing more regularly.

    ·        Reuniting with certain special people, and one very precious to me.







    Blessings:


     One of my favorite people surprised me with a card, words inside that soothe my heart, and fifty bucks.

    ·        I was asked to be in a comedy showcase on March 10th in Woodside, Queens.



    ·        I was able to approach an area of my apartment where I’d been   emotionally blocked from, and the decluttering began. Two bags of garbage so far from that area.

    ·        Waking each day.

    ·        My son is managing.

    ·        My best friend (my real life partner) is alive and well. We still help each other through life’s many challenges and still make each other crack up.

    ·        The editor who received my poem said he loved it and asked for more!

    ·        Excited about New York’s Got Talent on March 6th.





  4. TFW By Rhonda Hansome

    Saturday, February 9, 2019


    I love Show Biz!

    Catch me on SiriusXM Insight Ch 121 Noon - 2 PM Mondays on
    John Fugelsang's Tell Me Everything #HansomeMonday

    I'm honored to be in the Black Women In Comedy Festival
    8 PM Thu. 2-28 Cosmic Comedy / 7:30 Fri. 3-1 Icons of Comedy
    9:30 Fri. 3-1 Black Don't Crack / 7 PM Sat. 3-2 Griot StoryTelling
    9 PM Sat. 3-2 Solo Showcase
    Get Tickets Now!

    Click My Calendar For Additional Show Dates 
    Shameless Self-Promotion

    I Get Paid In Social Media Clicks. Hep A Sistah Out:
    Like & Follow On FaceBook - Twitter - Instagram



  5. This Sunday, Feb. 3rd at 8:30pm, I’ll be performing in a FREE comedy show at the Jazz on the Park Hostel.  You can BYOB.  36 West 106 Street near Central Park West.  Some people have told me, “Love you but it’s the Super Bowl.” 


    I’m not part of that tradition.  So if you, like me, would prefer to laugh 
    than to scream at the screen, get yourself a bottle of wine or whatever you like and come on over.  We’ll be having a heat wave to celebrate.


    On Wed., March 6th at 7pm, I’ll be in round one of

    New York’s Got Talent 

    The Green Room 42 inside Yotel 
    42nd Street and 10th Avenue 

    Here’s the link to get your ticket:






    If something doesn’t change for me soon in the financial realm, I may have to hold some kind of a fundraiser for my existence.  I’ve gotten further into debt.  This sucks so bad.  Don’t be surprised to get an invite to a rent party (remember those?).


    A former student told me yesterday that I had been the first teacher to 
    make him feel at home.  I was so moved.  He’s not a mushy kind of man, so it really surprised me to hear that.  When I told him, he said, “You never know what someone is thinking.”  Many are still upset that the new director (described as a “force of destruction” by an excellent worker who was let go) got rid of the ones she chose to get rid of (the ones the students loved) when the funding cut occurred.  He plans to let them know how he feels.  I told him, “Just don’t curse.”


    Another student, who is still attending the program and had been one of 
    my favorites, communicates with me on Facebook private messages.  He just needs five more points to get his diploma, so he’s trying to hang in there.  He is very blunt, which is a quality I appreciate.  We reminisced and laughed about some great moments we had in class.  Then he told me what a bitch his current math teacher is and how he respected me so much for standing up for students.  I told him that was probably why I’m not there and the bitches are.  


    (A few good ones are still there too, thank goodness.) 


    I miss the realness of the relationships I had with my adult students.  One basic thing that is so wrong with many educational programs is the teachers see the students as “them.”  Students need people they can connect with, feel accepted by, and can see themselves in.  They don’t need to have their flaws emphasized.  Psych 101 – positive reinforcement brings better results than negative reinforcement.  The main thing is to know oneself.  If a teacher knows her/his self, there is less projecting their bullshit on others.  But so many would rather just discuss curriculum.  And because it is all about the teacher and her/his curriculum, they feel the right to start a student’s day with, “You’re LATE!”  School can really destroy one’s natural desire to learn.  Too many of my Bronx peeps feel like school isn’t for them. 





    Recently, I ran into a teacher who works there part time.  We hugged.  I always liked her.  She told me the program is not the same program it once was.  I know that’s true.  I sometimes wonder how the former directors feel about what happened to the program.  They had put so much work into making it a relatively good place to be.  I was at lunch with another former co-worker last week.  He also wondered how the past administrators felt.  I said, “After all the years of work they did to build, they must now feel like Obama.”