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  1. Tell Me How You're Doin'

    Monday, March 30, 2020

    Hi people.  I’m so far, so good.  I hope you are too.  Hope you'll let me know.

    In the last couple of weeks, three people in my life decided to send me 
    gifts.  I think my jaw is still hanging.  A friend who lives in the next building from me gave me an apple, a package of raspberries, herbal tea, and twenty dollars.  Most importantly, she shared precious memories of when she used to babysit my son sometimes.  I had a smile the whole time she spoke.

    A poetry pal sent me fifty dollars and asked not to be identified because 
    he didn’t want to ruin his “bad” reputation.  Lol

    My longtime friend Judy sent me a card with a hundred dollars scotch-
    taped inside the card.  Oh my God.

    All of that really helped.  I was able to pay people to whom I owed money.  
    I was also able to buy necessities.

    I need to get used to being treated well.  At this time, it makes me cry – 
    not with sadness, rather just because I’m so moved.

    A former student messaged me on Facebook.  She asked how I’m doing.  
    That was so caring.  Well so far I’m okay.  I am grateful.  She and her immediate family are okay too, but she has relatives stricken with the virus.  This is so sad.  I have to remember that most people survive.

    Aside from all that, when I didn’t know when I’d get my daily inhaler 
    because it was on back-order, two people offered to give me their refills.  I am very moved by the kindness.  Neither of them used the inhaler I do, 
    but their offers felt amazing.  People can be so great while others can suck so badly.

    I do usually go out once a day.  I use the opportunity to take out garbage, 
    go to the store, and try to see my feline friend Mustache who lives in a store but is sometimes outside looking for trouble.  She can be rough stuff, but she and I have a loving relationship.  I think the need is mutual.  In the store, she isn’t treated like a furry child.  So I must feel so different to her.  As a child, I was given many challenges as well, so her pure love feels wonderful.  She is mostly black and some white.  Her snout is white with what looks like a black mustache above her top lip.  Hence, her name.  She’s my girl.

    I actually came up with a few bits of comedy during this homebound time.  
    And the bits were inspired by the horror we are living in.  But it’s not about the illness or the victims of it.  It stems from things I hear on TV, the lesser known symptoms, the lifestyle changes, etc.

    As a comic, I believe I’m supposed to stay current.  Most of my stuff is 
    kind of timeless.  But I try to write funny shit about current events.  I admire those who do it well.  I find it challenging.  But I generally enjoy challenges.

    Feel welcome to let me know you are okay or not okay.  I'd like to know.  

    Thanks for reading.

    love to CGG-M  💕

  2. Getting Thru...

    Tuesday, March 24, 2020

    One of the good things that happened on the night of my cancelled comedy show was being featured in Bold Magazine (an on-line publication).  The timing felt special.

    Yeah, they accidentally added an extra letter to my last name, but it has 
    since been fixed in the magazine.

    With all this having to stay home now, I should be using the opportunity to do a LOT of work in my apartment.  I’ve done some.  I need to do so much more.  When I do go through a pile, it feels good.  But in some ways, I’m in a rut, so just getting started is the hardest part.

    I can’t even hug my best friend.  However, it would be much worse if we 
    had the virus.  So I’m trying to remain grateful.  I’m trying to think positively.  It’s fuckin’ hard.  I pray my son is taking this seriously and doing all the precautionary stuff.

    Luckily, I have an internet connection from home, and though I’m behind 
    on my bill, I haven’t been shut down.  I’m part of an on-line poetry group, Brevitas, that normally shares short poems at the beginning and middle of the month.  They made an exception and added another cycle to send a poem having to do with the coronavirus crisis.  I must’ve felt the need because I was the first person to send something.  You can see it here.

    It’s gotten to the point where I look forward to taking out the garbage.  
    That’s essential, so I’m allowed.  We (the tenants in my building) have to go outside to get rid of it, so I get to go out! 

    love to CGG-M

  3. I was standing on line at the liquor store in my neighborhood a few days 
    back, and in front of me was a couple.  The man was purchasing a lot of wine.  Their bill was over $60.  The man told the worker, “Ya’know, we’re stocking up for the coronary.”  We all burst out laughing.  I’m sure he didn’t mean that, but that’s how it came out.

    He turned around to see who was laughing.  We all were.  He recognized 
    the man behind me.  They slapped five and did fancy handshakes, and hugged.  My eyeballs bulged at all the hand contact they had.  The girlfriend looked at me, and I said, “So much hand touching.”  She agreed and told him, “You were just talking about that.”  He didn’t seem to connect it.  Then I contributed, “That was a lot of hand touching.”  He replied, “Oh no, we’re cured.  If you were in Orchard Beach water, you’re cured.” 

    Some laughed, but I didn’t.  It concerns me, and, at the same time, I love 
    the humor and coping of my brother and sister Bronxites.

    I was reminded of when the deportations began to be a daily fear.  I was 
    in a store in my neighborhood.  The Mexican man behind the counter was telling an African customer, “You better speak good English, or they will deport you.”  While I was horrified at what was happening to so many families, they were laughing.  I admire the ability to endure, which is the definition of strength.

    As a comic, I should be able to make jokes about the madness, but my 
    process is so much slower it seems.  From horrifying to funny takes more time for me.

    This evening I had to go to the store.  I also had to ask for credit.  This is not easy for me.  I feel embarrassed and just find it hard.  But I did.  The Arab bodega nearby, that I’ve frequented for years, has been so good to me.  They gave me credit with a nonjudgmental and generous attitude, and I now have bread and peanut butter (and, I’m ashamed to say, cigarettes).  What a relief.  I needed something other than the pasta and sauce I have.

    I’m glad I don’t date.  I’ve lived through our people dying in the Vietnam 
    War, race riots, 9/11, the AIDS crisis.  With AIDS, we had to worry about exchanging bodily fluids.  But now, with the Coronavirus, we are supposed to stay 6 feet away from one another.  There’s no penis or condom that long. 


    I’m likely going to announce the cancellation of the 3/20 comedy show on City Island.  It saddens me a lot, but it just may have to be.  It’s still up in the air. 

    Safety and love to CGG-M.  💞

  4. Comedy, Poetry, Good Fortune

    Tuesday, March 10, 2020

    My comedy show 3/20 at The Artist (formerly the Starving Artist Café) 
    on City Island has a change in the lineup.  This is who you can come see and be very entertained by:

    Kristin Seltman

    Esteban Tino Romero


    Joanne Filan

    And me!

    For our guest spot, Eddie Messanelli will make us laugh.

    The cover is only ten bucks.  No minimum required, but you might be 
    tempted to get light fare and/or a delicious dessert.  You can BYOB if you like.  A hat gets passed around for contributions so the comics can get paid.  Laughter is guaranteed.

    Last week in my neighborhood, I had the good fortune of finding a brand 
    new unlimited one-week Metro Card.  I would’ve walked right past it if it weren’t for my feline friend Mustache.  She approached me, and I bent down to pet her and talk to her.  That’s when I saw the Metro Card in its plastic wrapping.  I did feel for whoever lost it, but if anyone was going to find it, I’m glad it was me.  That find made it easy for me to go to a poetry workshop I try to get to weekly though it’s not always possible.  I presented this poem:

    Teachers, Listen Up

    The job posting said:
    Make learning fun.
    Learning IS fun.
    It should say:
    Don’t suck the joy
    Out of learning
    By being an egotistical

    3/1/2020 Mindy Matijasevic

    Come to the comedy show on 3/20 and let’s laugh our asses off.  If laughter is the best medicine, let’s laugh coronavirus out of NYC.  Feel free to wear or not wear masks and vinyl gloves.  Mainly, bring your sense of humor.  It will be a good time.  Guaranteed.  We need it.  

    Deep love to CGG-M  💕

  5. Some Things Are Good

    Friday, February 28, 2020

    Hi everyone who reads this.  I appreciate your time and interest.  Now that I finally am feeling decently regarding all I went through for several months with lung issues, I have to be concerned about coronavirus with a piece of shit in the White House.  Goodness!

    Now, onto other news:  Last week I was booked for an acting/photoshoot 
    gig.  I was to show up, and after the paperwork, I would have my pic taken for a game that involves cards.  The ad wanted someone in my age range and who is a cool person.  I consider myself a very cool person.  But the guy wanted to speak on the phone first.  So I braced myself for “cool” to mean something else.  In my experience, “open-minded” has sometimes meant “open-legged” so I thought I should check.  I asked if this was something involving nudity.  He assured me it did not.  I showed up, did the paperwork, and when it was my turn, I was sat in an office and photographed.  Then he asked me to pick up the scissors and open them, then point them at the photographer as if I was threatening to stab him.  I thought of someone I am angry at and let my face follow my thoughts.  He took a couple of pics.  Then he said, “This is great.”  I was done.  I got paid $100 for less than five minutes.  I wish I had more like this.  I really need more like this.

    I headed straight for the bank, deposited the check, and went on my way.  At home I sent him an email thanking him and letting him know I’d love to be considered for any future work.  If this was a regular thing, I’d be financially better than I am now.  It is amazing how fast $100 goes.  One bill and one bottle of wine, and it was gone.

    My buddy and I did some work in my apartment.  It took hours.  We got a 
    big item out of my apartment.  I am now dealing with many piles.  I already got a bag ready for the shelter in my neighborhood.

    Been having weird dreams.  My ex-husband was in one.  A former co-
    worker was in another.  They were all disturbing. 

    I went to a comedy show to support a comedy friend.  He treated for 
    everything including dinner afterwards at the Olive Tree in the Village.  Just what I needed.  I had a good time.  All the comics (some very new) were good.  I even decided I’d contact a few for my show on City Island.  I don’t know if they have enough material yet, but they were all good.  By “good” I mean not just funny, but funny without being hateful.  No one put down those of us who are already down (women, gays, homeless, etc.)

    If you didn’t already put this on your calendar, March 20th is my show on 
    City Island.  I guarantee a very good time!

    Big love to CGG-M.  💕

  6. Upcoming Events

    Monday, February 17, 2020

    Happy day.  Those of you who live in NYC or are easily able to get here, 
    this is for you.  If any of these appeals to you, feel free to 
    make me smile with your presence.

    • ·        Wednesday, February 19th.  Featured poet – Phoenix Reading Series   
    •      at Odessa, 119 Avenue A near E. 7th Street.  6pm.  An open mic follows the feature.  Feel welcome to bring something to share.  $5 contribution.
    • ·        Saturday, March 7thPoetry reading at the Riverside Poetry Series, 
    •      Riverside Library, 127 Amsterdam Avenue.  2:00pm.  Free.  I’ll be one of many poets.
    • ·        Sunday, March 15th.  Stand-up – “The Comedy Dungeon” at Jazz on 
    •      the Park Hostel, 36 West 106th near Central Park West.  8:30pm.  FREE (and you can BYOB and food).

    • ·        Thursday, March 19th.   Stand-up – Women’s Night, 2600 Netherland 
    •      Avenue, Bronx, NY.  5:30.  $5 includes food and drinks.        

    •    Friday, March 20th  Stand-up - “Welcome the Spring with Laughter”   The Artist (formerly the Starving Artist Café), 249 City Island Avenue, Bronx, NY. We are welcomed by Elliot and Monica Glick who run the place.      This is my show, booked by me, and laughter is absolutely guaranteed.  Line-up: Robert Driemeyer, Kristin Seltman, Esteban Tino Romero, Mindy Matijasevic, and our guest spot goes to Eddie Messanelli.  Cover only $10.  NO minimum though you may be tempted by the menu.  Hat is passed around later for contributions for the performers.     

    I hope to see you there and hear your laughter. 

    Love to CGG-M always.  💕

  7. Fossil Dig and Other Things

    Friday, February 14, 2020

    Well, people, the infectious diseases doctor and I are done for now.  I’m 
    okay though vulnerable.  I’ll be more okay and less vulnerable if I break off my long-time affair with cigarettes.  I have to make a much better effort.

    The living room/sofa situation is moving along very slowly because I am a 
    procrastinator with issues.  Glad I got laundry done.  

    This Saturday, I am part of a group of poets who will be featuring in New 
    Jersey.  I feel good about that.  I will be getting a car ride from Manhattan.  That’s what makes it possible for me to accept such an offer.  I am grateful.

    In my decluttering (or what’s been called my 
    archeological dig), I find notes I’d written from years ago.  At the time, they were meant to be notes for a poem or comedy or autobiographical prose.  I just found one and can’t remember who in the world the other person was.  In the note, I refer to him as Videographer.

                                        Videographer:  You’re beautiful.
                                        Me:  Thank you.
                                        Videographer:  You are so full of feelings.
                                        Me:  Yep.  Spilling over.
                                        (Later -- in a PIZZA shop)
                                        Videographer:  This is expensive.

    I can only imagine I wrote this down because it seemed to represent a 
    theme in my life at the time, a theme I was ready to end.    

    Remember March 20th is my comedy show on City Island.  Mark your 
    calendar.  Laughter guaranteed.

    I need to dig for more fossils in my living room now.

    Love to CGG-M on Valentine's Day and everyday!