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    A few days back, I received an email inviting me to submit poems for the anthology they put out yearly.  The deadline is June 11th.  Normally I’d probably be scrambling on June 10th, but I was busy procrastinating doing something else that was due immediately, so I sent my poems.  The person wrote back thanking me for my promptness.  I had to chuckle.  Meanwhile, I had allowed something else get to a point of almost missing out on something important.  How you see me really depends on how, where, and when we meet.


     

    A friend from when I was 15-16 years old, a senior in high school, who I have been lucky to reconnect with in the last decade or more, ordered several of my ‘divorce’ t-shirts, and then instead of just paying for the shirts, sent more than double the bill.  I shake my head even as I read what I just wrote.  I was raised to not feel very deserving.  Experiences like this thankfully interfere with my brain’s wiring or something.  Mainly I find myself shaking my head in disbelief.  I thank God/dess for the angels on Earth.  I don’t yet have words for how deep this goes for me.  On a practical note, it means my phone is still in service.





     

    One of the craziest things I’ve read lately:

    https://bronx.news12.com/private-florida-school-won-t-employ-vaccinated-teachers

     


    Like the crazy man whose orange ass occupied the White House, they seem to think “medical freedom” means you have the right to make others sick and to discriminate against sane people. 


     

    In my life, I have often felt like Marilyn in “The Munsters.”  When a malignant narcissist is in a position of power, the entire country becomes sick.  Good is bad, and up is down.  The people who actually care about others are seen as the problem.  (At a former job, “nice” and “sincere” were used as insults, so what made me a hit with students caused conflict among some staff.)  It happens in unhealthy families, in unhealthy job settings, and now on a much larger scale.  To all the Marilyns out there, I appreciate you.

     

     


     


    So much love always to CGG-M ❤❤❤

     

    Mindy Matijasevic 

    4/2021


  2. Dreams; Shirts; Anal Region

    Wednesday, April 21, 2021


















    In recent months, I have been having so many vivid dreams. Some are very disturbing, so I’m glad my subconscious is dealing with things while I sleep. I have enough stuff in my awake time to keep me concerned. 



    Sometimes, when I try to write, I feel I may not have more comedy or poetry inside. The other day when I awoke, I remembered a dream I had. I immediately got a poem out of it. It’s like my mind handed it to me. I find it more challenging to write comedy, maybe because that’s the skill I’ve had less years trying to develop. Also, not everything is funny to me. I typically feel pissed and/or hurt before feeling humorous. By the time I get to what I consider funny, I’ve been through the wringer. 




    I will admit, during all this pandemic time, I haven’t performed comedy in front of people. It makes me wonder if I can still do it. I want to. It’s a thrilling experience (usually). 




    Next week is my second Pfizer shot. I hope so much my buddy can take me there and back this time. 




    I saw my little Mustache today. We had our affection session. She meows a lot to me. I respond, “I know. You want to tell me things.” Then I walked her to her food bowl which is our routine. As she eats, I pet her and always tell her, “I’ll see you next time.” Her tail stands straight up declaring her joy. Years ago, I read a book about cat behavior. The author referred to that as “showing anal region.” 





    I still have some of these, so let me know if you are interested for yourself or for someone else. They are unisex and make a unique gift. Hanes; 100% pre-shrunk cotton; XL; print color is apricot. 









    P.S. If you don’t have a Blogger account and you want to leave a comment, you will appear as “Unknown.” So please include your name in the comment. 😊 Thanks. 





    Much love to CGG-M ❤❤❤

    Mindy Matijasevic 4/2021


  3. Beyond Disturbing

    Saturday, April 17, 2021

    I learned that a woman working construction in the Bronx (City Island) was murdered by a man who brought her food and wanted to have a ‘relationship’ with her other than friendship. She was 52 years old. He was 66. I guess he never learned to handle rejection or understand that murder is not foreplay. Makes me wonder how many others he killed. She couldn’t have been the first person to tell him no. All this woman did was introduce him to her boyfriend. I admit that this tragedy just made me feel more convinced that it is never safe. The woman was 52! She was wearing her hard hat. It was daytime. But she had the nerve to not be available. She must’ve thought she was a person or something. Punishable by death. The murderer was caught. The woman’s actual boyfriend was nearby and chased him down, and a friend joined in the chase. They held him for the police. All that is good. It would be worse if he got away. But she’s dead. At 52. For believing she has the fuckin’ right to say no.

  4. Do I Look Like A Man To You?

    Monday, April 5, 2021


     







    I have an appointment for tomorrow, Tuesday, 4/6, for my first shot.  I’m nervous.  Everyone has such different reactions to the first and second shots.  The location is not near me or easy to get to by public transportation.  My best friend has a dental appointment that day.  I still hope to figure out how he can help me since our appointments are two hours apart, and he drives.    But it’s not looking good.


    In the past two weeks, I have been mistaken for a man several times.  I was called “Sir” earlier by a man trying to get people to come to his church.  I didn’t accept his pamphlet and didn’t tell him I’m a woman.  I just shook my head no and kept walking.  It seems to happen when I don’t wear make-up or earrings and do have my hood up.  Then the mask covers half my face.  I guess it doesn’t take much.  Don’t even have to whip it out and pee in the street.


    In the last blog, I mentioned having a lung scan.  I’ve since received the results.  So far, okay.  Whew.  Getting the results is the hardest part for me.

     

    I do have indications on my lungs of past issues.  In the second half of 2019, I had Legionnaire’s.  Then in the spring of 2020, I had a mild case of COVID.  I now have breathing issues, of course made worse by smoking.  I have a ways to go to get okay again.


    I’ve had so many vivid dreams in the past months.  Last night, it was a young man, maskless, coming over to me to sit and talk.  I didn’t know him.  I was flailing my arms and telling him, “No! I didn’t get my vaccination yet.”

     

    You like?

     



     

    I have extra-large.  If interested for you or as a gift, contact me at mindyinthebronx@gmail.com and put “T-shirt” in the subject line.

     

     

     

     

    Much love to CGG-M ❤❤❤

     

    Mindy Matijasevic