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  1. Be My Valentine

    Tuesday, January 27, 2015

    The Divorced Divas of Comedy is having a Valentine's Day show.  Folks, the pressure of holidays like this can get crazy.  People feel like they are inadequate if they aren't someone's Valentine and all that shit.  Get dressed, give yourself a hug, look in the mirror, tell that person "I love you," and take yourself out to the show.  You will have a good time.  Everyone who was at the last show had only one complaint -- their laugh muscles were hurting. 

    My earliest Valentine's Day memories were with my mother.  She brought home construction paper, white lacey paper, and all kinds of fun materials for us to make cards.  I feel the thrill even now when I remember how I felt then.  I miss her so much.  She was my first and best Valentine I ever had.
    I was with a wrong man for a long time.  Each year on Valentine's Day, I received something special within his means.  Then he got me pregnant.  I needed medical coverage for me and the baby.  I married him.  On my first married Valentine's Day, I received nothing.  Not even a card.  He was an artist, by the way, so he could've folded a piece of paper and made something impressive in minutes.  But he chose to be hateful now that he believed he "had" me.  I remember saying, "I'm not your Valentine anymore?"  He said, "I wasn't near a store."  Less than two months before, I spent 13 hours in labor.  But walking across the street and two blocks to Rite Aid was too much for the man.  My value plummeted after having our baby.  I would not understand the pathology behind that for many years.  After that, I didn't care what he gave me in future years for Valentine's Day.  It had no meaning anymore.  I'd even suggest he not bother. The best gift would be he leaving.  The year I needed love most since I was pumping it out anywhere from 19 to 24 hours a day to our colicky baby, he showed his self.  But he wouldn't leave.  Didn't want to leave a space that might allow someone else to actually love me.  Staying in my apartment married was his stalking style.  His "love" was an act of hate.  It caused a lot of misery.  Finally many years later, on a Valentine's Day, he moved out. 
    Having a Valentine's Day comedy show is probably the best way I can spend it.  I hope you'll be my Valentine and come to the show.
    From the first Divorced Divas of Comedy show: 
    I always find it so eye-opening to watch myself perform.  The jokes that work and the ones that don't work vary so much from audience to audience, delivery to delivery.  I have come a long way and still could go a long way.  Besides the actual comedy, there's the posture, the needing toning belly, the sneakers that I should have changed out of and into nicer shoes, the hand in the pocket, the sweating, the sounding too pissed off on certain topics, so much to become aware of. 

    I am so excited about the Valentine's Day show line-up.  Ellen Orchid, Rhonda Hansome (our Thursday "She"), Ken Watter (our first male guest "Diva" and coming in from Maryland), and me.


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