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Tuesday, February 2, 2016
| Labels: Mindy Matijasevic, narcissist damage | |
Tuesday, February 2, 2016
Posted by
Mindy Matijasevic
at
5:06 AM
|
Labels:
Mindy Matijasevic,
narcissist damage
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I have witnessed so much of this behavior, by a person who was not my partner but manipulated their child to hurt their ex. Hideous pain inflicted with scars that don't fade quickly. The best revenge is living well. To show that they do not have control over you. To move out and ahead of them will eventually kill their roots in your life. I wish that personal power to everyone that has known a person like this. It is YOUR life, not theirs. Not anymore, anyway.
I love your heart and ability to understand so much, Liz.
And you know what happens to the children (even if grown) -- they stay stuck, for varying amounts of time, in trying to get the narcissist parent's love. They will identify with the narcissist. They will turn on the nurturing parent -- the one whose love they know is there. It is such a painful ordeal.
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The nurturing parent is a lock. A given. They are not confused about where they stand with that parent so it's easy for them to chase down the path of the other parent. They will keep jumping for that carrot, until they realize (in their own time) that the carrot will never be caught and, if they do get a nibble, it will be bitter and not satisfy. I understand because I have witnessed this. It is heartbreaking. Again, the best revenge is living well. The best example to show is how powerful YOU are in moving forward and not dancing to their tune. Take your life back, do not give them any attention (because they do NOT matter in your life) and move ahead. Things are always better there.
The adult child matters.
YES! The child I know is an adult now and walking her own path.