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    Showing posts with label Luigi. Show all posts
    Showing posts with label Luigi. Show all posts

  1. Comedy Shows and an Early Birthday Gift

    Monday, November 8, 2021


     








    I was without the luxury of the internet for a couple of weeks.  I’m glad that is solved. 

     

    The autumn comedy show at The Artist had a great line-up.  In that sense, it was very good.  However, we didn’t get as much audience as I’m accustomed to.  I hope we can get back up to the pre-pandemic audience size.  Back then, Elliot (the owner) said he’d be glad to get more chairs if necessary.  It was that packed.  If you were not at the 10/22 show, these were the funny folks you missed.


    Pudge Fernandez

    Jean Kim




    Linda San Lucas


    Hosted by yours truly...       


    Mindy Matijasevic


    Audience members and some comics connected after the show.  That warmed me.  Several friends and I went for drinks afterwards, and I heard so much great feedback about the comics’ performances.  I’m usually proud of the line-up, and this was no exception.


     .....


    Again I’m guilty of watching The Bachelorette.  Now I know what I like about it.  I see how women get rid of a man when they see red flags.  I wish I’d seen that in my teens.  Unfortunately, I tended to consider other people’s pain more than my own.  I did things all wrong.  Very wrong.  My body spoke to me – pain in my chest, throat, inability to eat, crying often, etc. – but I didn’t listen.  Can’t get the years back.  I’m just relieved to be on my own.  Good friends have given me more happiness and real love than any romantic relationship ever has.  And I have not seen anyone else’s marriage/romantic relationship that I would want to be in.  It may work for those in it, but I wouldn’t feel good in it.


     .....


    On a very happy note:  My best friend, who is very talented in fixing, building, all kinds of stuff most of us do not know how to do, fixed my malfunctioning toilet tank today (about three hours of skilled labor) and bought the parts needed, etc. as an early birthday gift.  This was a great gift.  I now have a flushing toilet again.  For quite a while, I was using a water-filled bucket to flush.  One of the best parts of this gift is I don’t have to have people in here, that I don’t know, to do it.  I think I need a dog again.  I used to get people (either to install cable or whatever else) who would ask me to lock up the dog in another room.  I remember thinking and realizing that one of the benefits of having a dog is protection.  I’d say, “No.  He will only smell you.  The only reason he would ever attack someone is if they were trying to hurt me.”  That was accepted, and I felt good about not caving.  My dog Luigi (2000-2015) was someone I felt 98% sure of.  I can’t say that about most humans.




    .....



    Next comedy show I’m having at The Artist (249 City Island Avenue) will be December 17th at 8pm.  Hope you’ll put that on your calendar and get yourself to City Island.  It will be another great line-up.  You can’t typically get this kind of live comedy and funny at these prices.  $10 cover; no minimum (though you will be tempted by the light fare and delicious desserts by Jenny's Sweets); you can BYOB; contributions requested for the hilarious comics.




     



    Much love to CGG-M  💕💕💕


    Mindy Matijasevic

    November 2021

     

     

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 7:33 PM | Labels: , , , , , , , , , , | 7 comments | |

  2. Sharin' Stuff

    Tuesday, June 29, 2021

     

    Sharin’ Stuff

     








    I went out to the store after midnight for a bad reason – a few loose cigarettes.  My punishment was seeing a rat.  Damn.  I thought the block had this under control.  It was under control for a few years.  I hope this gets solved before it becomes a tremendous deal.  There was a time it was so bad that I wanted my buddy to drive me into the lobby when he took me home.  I can’t bear the thought of it getting that way again.

     

    A number of blogs back, I shared proudly that I did my taxes days before the deadline.  I’m still waiting on my refund.  I can’t believe it.  The local one came quickly but that was a very small one.  I need the federal one.  I have checked on line a few times, and the status is that it is still being processed.  I can’t f’in’ believe this.  They blamed the delay on the pandemic.

     

    I’m not proud to admit this, but I’ve been watching the Bachelorette.  I’ll blame the pandemic.

     

    Lately, when I see my little feline friend, Mustache, she is very loud and demanding for affection.  If I’m by the counter purchasing something, she insists on letting me know she’s there and waiting.  She rubs hard against my legs and ankles.  Sometimes she rubs her cheek against the top of my feet.  Then after my change is given, I bend down to pet her and she has much to say.  Then we go to her food – she likes me to walk her there.  She starts eating with her tail straight up, expressing her happiness.  I pet her and tell her, “I’ll see you next time.”  It’s always an experience that makes me smile.  Such pure love.  💗 😻

     

    I want to have a four-legged member of the family again, but I have concerns.  First I was concerned about the finances and if there’s a need for veterinary care at some point.  A woman in the neighborhood said if I speak to the ASPCA, they may provide help for that.  I was happily surprised but never looked into it.  (I’m hoping I’ll be able to earn money again now that so many folks are vaccinated.)  Another concern is that though a cat doesn’t have to go out to relieve her/himself, they shed more than many dogs.  I have breathing issues, so that could be a problem unless I become a much better housekeeper.   😆 😅 😄 😃 😂 😁 😊 😏 😤  A dog does have to be walked several times a day.  I can do that, but I wonder about the days when it is 3 degrees.  I don’t know if I’ll be able to do that.  I find that torturous.  I’m still dealing with the after-effects of Legionnaire’s (Fall/Winter 2019) and a mild case of COVID (Spring 2020) combined with cigarette smoking.  I’m working on it, but I just don’t feel sure I should have a furry child in the apartment yet.  Yes, one can have four legs, be furry, and be my child.  It’s the heart that matters.

     

    When I had my darling Luigi, I tried to get him to do his bizness on newspaper in the apartment when it was a blizzard or extremely cold out.  No way.  Once he had learned that he was a “good boy” for going outside, there was no way back.  He was a “good boy” for the rest of his life.





     



    Now I’d want an older cat or dog for several reasons.  They are usually not the ones most desired for adoption.  They deserve peaceful and loving senior years after all they might have been through at the will of shitty humans.  It is worse for the animal if they outlive their human.  It hurts a whole lot when they pass, but it’s worse for them if we do.  Since I’m not a youngster (except in my mind), I don’t want to take the chance on a very young fur baby who might outlive me.

     

     


    Love always to CGG-M ❤ ❤ ❤

    Mindy Matijasevic

    June 2021

     

     

     

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 10:19 PM | Labels: , , , , , , , , , | 2 comments | |


  3.  
     
     
     
     
    My fuchsia flowers are still upright and looking wonderful. They are in a vase I once bought for my mother.

    The day after Good Friday/divorce anniversary was a year since my Luigi went to Heaven. Though that was a very hard event, it was surrounded by events that had made it harder. A scene followed outside the place. I haven’t really gotten through all the trauma of that day. I know by how I find it so hard to walk on the block of the vet’s office.
     
     
     
     
     
     
    Much of my life feels like PTSD. That was once thought to be unique to soldiers returning from war. It has now come to include those who suffered under emotional and/or other kinds of abuse for long periods of time. I was born into a war that didn’t cease for the arrival of a baby.

    My marriage was a different kind of war; in a way, more eerie.

    (I know in my comedy, I make it sound funny, but that comedy did not come for free; it was long-earned. Writing my stand-up material is part of my healing journey. Everything I make us laugh about is something I once cried and/or fumed about.)

    The ongoing heartbreak is how my son was not protected throughout the divorce war, the pain caused him, and my ex going to lows I hadn’t thought he would (out of human decency and parental love – BUT I was wrong). My mistake was not only believing in something that just was not there, but not believing in the evil that was.

    What an education.*

    I found it difficult, but I got through the week.

    Each day I felt surprised that the flowers are still doing so well.  It helped me on a level I am not ready to discuss publicly.

     

     

     

    *(Aramis, I wasn’t able to receive when you tried to tell me certain things about the existence of evil.)

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 2:14 AM | Labels: , , , , , , | 3 comments | |

  4. how the hell? how the fuck?

    Tuesday, April 14, 2015


     
     
     
     
    Two days after putting my darling Luigi to sleep (amongst other horrible happenings not for public blogging), I was to perform in the third Divorced Divas of Comedy show at the Clarion Theatre in our springtime show.  I advertised it saying if it didn’t feel like spring yet, we’d bring the spring.  I wondered how the hell I was going to do that now. 
    I am the producer as well.  I entertained the idea of replacing myself as a comic in the show.  But I had already advertised the show with me as one of the performers.  I just didn’t know how I would be funny.
    People paid for tickets, and I like to see them leaving very happy about their experience. 
    Not only had I not yet decided on my set, I couldn’t imagine doing it.  I have done well and not done well with the same material, so I know the delivery is the main thing.  And that is what is so difficult when one’s heart is broken and compounded by more shit beneath it and on top of it.  My best buddy in the world knew what I was enduring.  Life would be terribly lonely without such a precious friend. 
    “How the fuck am I supposed to be funny tomorrow?” I asked him.
    “Well, you can just say, ‘Look, I had to put my dog to sleep, and my son hates me. Other than that, I’m a barrel of laughs.’” 
    He, once again, made me laugh in spite of all I was going through.  He’s magic that way.  It helped knowing I could say that line if I needed to.
    One of the other comics invited Michele Balan, (http://www.comicbalan.com/index.php?option=com_frontpage&Itemid=1) and she came!  She and her beautiful partner attended the show.  I told myself, Mindy, you must put aside all the stuff that is weighing you down.  Don’t fuck this up.  All the pain will be waiting for you.  You must put it temporarily aside.  You know you can be good up there, and you will be good, dammit!
    I introduced the show and the first comic.  I watched her set.  Then it was my turn.  I decided not to say the stuff about my dog and my son.  I felt it would only make me feel better and not the audience.  It did me well just thinking it.  I tried to just be the barrel of laughs.
    I forgot shit and my set was quite under the time I was supposed to do, but I am not going to blacklist myself.  I was proud that I pulled it off at all.  No one in the audience knew what I was going through except for a couple of friends.  I did well with what I did.
    After I introduced the next comic, I went back to sitting near Michele.  She took my hand and said, “You were very good.  You were original and smart.”
    That was the best I could ask for.  I got through it.  I did well.  There was laughter throughout.  I was grateful.  All of the comics -- Ellen Orchid, Taffy Jaffe, Leighann Lord -- did a wonderful job.
    After the show, which was a very, very good show, Michele Balan and her guest drank wine and talked with us in the dressing room.  Michele said that she didn’t remember the last time she went to a comedy show to watch.  And she enjoyed the show!  Yes, I’m proud.

     

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 12:00 AM | Labels: , , , , , , , , | 6 comments | |

  5. Here's to Luigi

    Tuesday, March 24, 2015

     
     
    I have to bring my dog in to be put to sleep any day now.  He has a growth blocking most of his passage inside his rear.  In spite of that, he loves eating, insists on sharing my challah bread in particular and recently stole my remaining part of a cheese danish, bounded in the snow as he did as a puppy, wags at and communicates with his dog friends and even not-yet-friends, adores certain humans and demonstrates it, sniffs people with interesting smells on the knees of their jeans, etc.  He even runs sometimes like a younger dog.  His spirit is so alive most of the time.  So of course it feels terrible.  He would be 15 on June 1st.  Surgery of that complexity in such an area is not really recommended for him at his age. 

    The vet understood that he is enjoying so much about living still.  He also understood that I didn’t want his last experience to be a rectal exam, which was necessary to determine what was happening with the growth.  So he told me to increase the dose of the laxatives, he gave more antibiotics and pain relievers if needed, told me to take him to the park to have fun since he is hanging on so well, BUT as soon as he can’t poop, to be ready to say goodbye.  He said it would be agony if he got closed up totally.  So I have to not let that happen.

    I am glad I wrote this because I have barely any more room left for grief on my chest.

    When Luigi smelled a chicken sandwich I had, he was very interested and began his begging.  I said, “Don’t worry.  Of course I’m going to share with you.  I’m going to spoil you rotten!”

    My buddy and I brought Luigi to my young adult son on Monday night for them to have some time together.  I am very glad we did.

    Life is so everything, often at the very same time, so in addition to having to part with my darling Luigi, there’s work, family issues, financial concerns, and the Divorced Divas of Comedy Springtime Show is on Saturday.  Yes, no matter what else is happening, the show does go on.  There are still seats available.  http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/1361864  Laughter is guaranteed.  Great way to welcome the spring.  Leighann Lord will be closing the show.  In case you aren’t familiar with Leighann and her comedy, take a look here: www.veryfunnylady.com.  Then get your ticket and come to the show.  It would be wonderful to hear your laughter.


    On Monday, March 30, 2015, I will be one of 3 featured poets for the Saturn Series Poetry Reading, 8pm, at Shades of Green, 125 East 15 Street.   www.shadesofgreenpub.com/

    It seems Powell Burns does have the luck of the Irish because he also won a pair of tickets to “Clinton, the Musical” after winning a pair to “Hunter Gatherers.”  The other pair goes to Mindy Levokove, a co-worker and friend who I feel fortunate to know.

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 12:00 AM | Labels: , , , , , , , , | 3 comments | |

  6. The Flying Leap

    Tuesday, November 11, 2014


     

    I went for a walk with a co-worker friend last Wednesday.  It was late afternoon.  Though it was still daylight when we headed out, it became dark during the walk.  The ground we were on was uneven.  My co-worker had just asked me about the time early in my marriage.  I was deep into it when I took a flying leap.  Could it be any more metaphorical? 


    This time, it was a literal fall and a bit bizarre.  I was stumbling and trying not to fall, but I was losing against gravity.  I was going to the left.  That’s what made it bizarre.  Usually I’d be falling forward.  My co-worker was on my left and I tried to grab on in hopes of at least lightening the fall.  Maybe I did; I’m not sure if it would have been worse.  The street was not smooth.  I landed hard on my side.  I injured my ribs badly.  I couldn’t fuckin' believe it. 

    Some things had been going pretty well, and then this felt like a setback in some ways.

    It takes at least six weeks to heal.  The Divorced Divas Comedy Show is in less than that.  I expect to be feeling a lot better by then.  As much as it hurts, I’m supposed to breathe deeply and cough each hour to help prevent pneumonia and lung infection.

    I didn’t go to either job the day after this happened. Too much pain.  The day after that, the pain wasn’t really improving except for the shoulder area.  I was able to use that arm more.  But the rib cage area was still awful.  A friend convinced me why I should get an x-ray.  She said if it is a fracture (a crack) then it will have to mend on its own.  If it is broken, it could be doing damage to another part of me.  Since the pain wasn’t lessening, I knew I needed to go.  So I managed to take off my clothes and shower and get dressed mainly because the shoulder and arm were much improved.  Nothing is broken there.  But when I called the medical group, no one answered after more than twenty rings.  Plus I have my own desire not to go, so I decided since it was the afternoon and they may have been done for the day, I’d go the next day early in the morning with the support of my friend.  I needed help to sit there.  I knew I could get there physically, but waiting while being afraid was what I needed help with.

    We went.  The nurse had to ask me if anyone was threatening me.  (I guess because I came in saying I fell and was sure I broke some ribs.)  I said "no," but I wanted to say that if I died, some folks would be glad.  No point in complicating things.  Then she had to ask me if I drink.  Of course I drink.  I told her, "Yes but not that day." It went on:
    "Daily?"
    "No."
    "Socially on weekends?"
    "Not every weekend."
    "Monthly or less?"
    "Well, sometimes..."
    "Monthly or less?"
    Realizing there was probably no box on the form for a real answer, I said, "Monthly." 
    There are times I drink a whole bottle of wine in one night. Weeks can go by without any. Then there may be a week where it's daily for a few nights.  It's not a matter of drinking socially; I drink emotionally.  My answers don't fit in little boxes any more than I fit in a file.

    I saw a doctor on duty though it wasn’t my regular doctor.  She wanted to know if I wanted a referral also for a mammogram and a colonoscopy.  Uh, no.  I was in so much pain.  A breast flattening and ass search was not what I went there for.  To be fair, she saw how long it had been since I was there and figured she’d get some things done while she had me there.  She asked if I wanted my flu shot today.  I wanted it no day.  I told her I have never taken the flu shot.  She asked about a tetanus shot.  I couldn’t stand this when I was in so much pain.  I said, “I want an x-ray and painkillers that are strong enough to need a prescription.” 

    She sent me to the lab for an x-ray.  They said they don’t do it on Saturdays.  I couldn’t accept that after all it took to get myself there.  Then they said if I needed it today, I had to use the lab in the hospital (around the corner).  I did.  They found three fractured ribs.  The 4th, 5th, and 6th ribs were fractured in the back.  I honestly don’t think they saw everything.  I believe it is fractured in other places too, or the soft tissue is also very pained.  The doctor seemed surprised that I had what I came in saying I had -- multiple fractures.  After all, I didn't go to medical school; I just live in my body and was in it when I fell.  That, I learn over and over, doesn't hold weight with every doctor.  
     
    My buddy picked up my painkillers from the drug store.  I’ve had to take more than the dose prescribed to get any effect.  I needed something stronger to knock me out in the first few days like codeine or the date-rape drug -- without the rape. 

    I must add that I am grateful I have a friend who really cares about me and my dog (and has walked my Luigi ever since this happened), that I have insurance, and that I was able to pay the $30 co-payment (it wasn’t long ago when I would've been bouncing checks to get medical care). 

    With all my complaints and aching and paining, I am probably going to heal from this way, way faster than healing from emotional and spiritual abuse.  With that, there's no x-ray to say "Right there, that's where it is."



    The show will go on!  http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/905345
     

     

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 12:00 AM | Labels: , , , , , , , | 3 comments | |

  7. Just Stuff

    Tuesday, September 2, 2014

     
     
     
    Well, boo fuckin' hoo.  I didn't get selected to participate in the festival where I had submitted a video of me doing stand-up.  Almost sixty people were selected.  I am very curious about the quality of their work and how mine lacks.  In the past few days, I remembered that announcements would be made soon.  So I again watched the tape I had sent, and I realized that the first minute did not get enough laughs per minute if that's how it is judged.  I wondered if they'd watch the whole thing or if my first minute was it.  Oh well.   

    I have had some free time though quite broke.  My dog had vet needs which came when I'm the most broke.  That's the way it goes.  I know my free-ish time will be coming to an end, and though I was able to do many things, there are still many things I didn't get to.  I knew I'd feel somewhat uplifted if I did some cleaning of very neglected areas.  I already had the supplies, so no money was needed.  I finally put the thought and desire into action at 3am one night.  I felt better about myself turning something awful into its original white and shiny state.  Scents changed as a result, and I wondered for a quick second if I upset the mouse world.  The next day a mouse ran by and into my broom closet.  Ugh.  I have to work consciously to feel like it is my apartment and not the mouse's.  I am afraid of rodents and detest that they enter where I exist.  I stomped around to try to convince myself I am bigger and all the stuff people tell me.  My dog immediately knew what that meant, and he then seems afraid which is just awful.  Meanwhile, I am supposed to make sure he doesn't lie on the hard floor so his elbow can heal.  I feel I need to pad the whole place.  He has a bed, he uses the sofa, and I allow him on a chair, but still he lies on the floor also.  Maybe for the coolness.  But his elbow needs to heal.  I'm not supposed to let him lick it, so I put a cone on his head which he hates.  He's an old man, a darling old man, and I hate to make him miserable with the cone, but he has to heal.  He's on a second round of stronger antibiotics. 
    ​



    Soon, both jobs are going to blast me away.  That's how it feels.  I have to remember to breathe and how much better it will be to be able to pay my bills more easily again. 

    I just opened my bottle of wine.  Ten bucks, and I'm my Saturday night date.  I just need a big strong man who laughs in the face of a mouse.   


    ​


                                                                                                                                                                                   
    ​Other than that, I need a nonjudgmental cleaning and therapy team to help me.  It's not that I don't want to throw things out.  I am very happy when I've gone through clutter and fill a bag for garbage.  I appreciate the cubic inches of air space.  It feels hopeful.  What is so very difficult is going through and looking at each thing.  No one can do that for me.  I'm digging out, but the pace isn't fast enough.  It's like an archaeological dig.  I find things from eras ago.
     
    I have prepared a shopping bag of clothes to bring to the shelter in the neighborhood.  The more stuff I get out of my house, the better.  I am so overwhelmed.  I need to get this place back to where it once was when it looked like someone creative and healthy enough lived here on a low budget.  Now it looks like a baffling case study. 


    If you would like to come to a free comedy show this Thursday evening, I'll be in Johnny Zito's show at Goodbye Blue Monday, 1087 Broadway, Bushwick, Brooklyn.  (J train to Koskiuszko Street & walk a block.)  7:30pm, nice place, CBGB vibe, affordable drinks, and good food.  I hope to have the honor of entertaining you.  It is my last free Thursday night for some months.  Next week, my evening job will be in full swing.  I am thankful that Johnny fit me into this week's show, and I hope you come and have some laughs with me.  (Hosted by Greggory Daniels! Stand-up from Joe Newman, Robert Commiskey, Monica Taller, Gabe Zucker, Mindy Matijasevic, Rogin Kim, Momoh Pujeh, Mike Hernandez, Dee Marie, Caleb Barge, Yohei Kawamata and Johnny Zito.)
     
     

     

     

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 12:00 AM | Labels: , , , , , , , , , | 3 comments | |

  8. To the Theatre, Dahling

    Tuesday, June 17, 2014


     
     
     
     
     
     
    This year, because I've won tickets and was gifted with tickets and offered a discount by a friend, I've been to three plays so far.  A friend and I attended each one together.  Each time we did, we planned to go out afterwards to drink, eat, and talk about the play.  The first one was a one-woman show called "My Mother Has Four Noses" and was such a tear-jerker that we cried so much during it and didn't want to talk much about it when we left.  We were emotionally exhausted.  We did eat and drink though.

    The second one was written by someone we know and like.  He offered us the opportunity to see it at student prices.  We like him a lot but had a very hard time liking any character in the play.  Yet it was riveting, never boring, and had us wanting to know what happens next the whole way through.  It felt disturbing though.  Each character felt void of humanity.  In that sense, it was the total opposite of the first play we saw. 

    I've been fortunate to have a continuing relationship with the woman who provided the tickets for the original contest.  From time to time, she offers me the chance for my readers to win a pair of tickets to a play.  I find it so exciting.  It's an experience so many of us cannot otherwise afford.  Sometimes she's able to give me a pair of tickets for myself as well. 


    The last contest was for tickets to see the sci-fi musical called "The Anthem."  I was also given a pair of tickets to see it.  I went with the same friend on a Friday night.  We were tired from the week of work.  So we both had mixed feelings about sitting for a play.  I told her that it was good it was a musical as that would keep me awake.  Well, the set, the costumes, the movement, the singing, and the energy of the cast kept me very awake.  It was more a play done in song rather than a musical.  I guess when I hear 'musical,' I think they'll break into song every ten or fifteen minutes.  This was more like every one or two minutes.  When we left, we compared the story to what is happening on the jobs -- the rules, the uniformity, common core standards, attendance policies designed to throw people out rather than help them stay in, the going backwards before independent thinking was seen as evidence of having a mind and that being a good thing.  In the play, there was a rebellion against that by those who risked independent thought.  Then we discovered that we both have a favorite place to eat and drink -- the Olive Tree by West 3rd Street.  It's right above the Comedy Cellar where Louis C.K. tapes his stand-up for his sitcom.  The tables are blackboards and they serve up chalk.  We had lots to talk about while drawing and playing word games on the table. 

    A couple of Long Island Ice Teas and I slept the whole way home on the D train.  Once home, I wanted coffee, the dog wanted one more walk, and it continued to be a happening night.
     
     
    Luigi, 14 years of loving so far...

    Posted by Mindy Matijasevic at 12:00 AM | Labels: , , , , , | 3 comments | |