I thank God/dess for the people in my life who, from time to time, pull me out of my funk. A writer friend hired me to proofread a grant application for her. When I finally did the work, I actually felt productive and useful. It’s been a while since I felt that way.
Over a week ago, I spilled some wine and fucked up my keyboard. I couldn’t even type in my password to get on the computer, never mind get on-line. My buddy loaned me a keyboard and told me how to connect it to my computer. So I’m back in business. However, when it all happened, I couldn’t participate in the weekly poetry workshop that is often a highlight of my week. I was able to return the following week. It makes such a difference for me. The interaction with the others has become so necessary, even if it is only on-line. Even without a webcam or mic, I can see and hear the others, plus I can write in the chat box.
A friend from high school sent me a monetary gift. The generosity and love – wow. I can keep my utilities going (including internet, cable, and phone). Thank you, Susy. 💛
My friend Mindy Levokove and I are going to meet this week so she can record me reading 15 – 20 minutes of my poetry. She is going to have two more poets as well and present it as a poetry reading on line. I am glad to be part of that. We will do this outdoors, so we are not breathing at each other. This will be my first train ride in many months. I hope no craziness breaks out. Since birth, I have had way too much craziness in my life.
As I continue to declutter my apartment, I find so many more piles. It is so overwhelming. I live in a one-bedroom apartment, and I don’t know how I ever fit so much shit in here. Goodness! It is such a mirror image of the heavy piles inside me.
Tonight I went to the store. The corner was blocked by police tape. There was a patrol car on the sidewalk, lights flashing. I asked the store worker what happened. Apparently a woman stabbed her boyfriend to death. Someone else told me it had been an abusive relationship. Without more info, I don’t know which one was the abuser. I do know many people have a worse situation than I. Again, I felt grateful that I (with the help of Divine intervention) have stayed away from romantic involvements. It doesn’t feel worth it to me. Plus I watch a lot of “Dateline.” I feel horrified at people without a conscience and a great sense of relief that I don’t date anymore.
Another of my pandemic poems has been published on line by Highland Park Poetry. https://www.facebook.com/highlandparkpoetry/ It is the October 10th daily poem.
Regarding the VP debate:
Much love to CGG-M 💕💕
Mindy Matijasevic
